Showing posts with label Nonsense. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nonsense. Show all posts

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Evil Celebration

Courtesy - fAmEnXt
Dear All,

On the moonless holy eve of Diwali, I have this gloomy feeling within my heart being unable to wish you a happy Diwali. Do you realize that all your celebrations lead to misery for others and all that you do to celebrate are nothing but acts of evil?

The crackers you burst are the cause for panic among dogs, birds, other animals and causes pain in the heart of animal-loving humans.

Often, children are employed and exploited in cracker manufacturing units and scores of such innocent children die before experiencing puberty in deadly accidents in the ill-equipped factories.

The sweet that you devour to add sweetness in your life are made of milk and sugar, both bitter causes of pain to cattles and humans alike. Production of milk is at the heart of all inhuman treatment of cattles, who are made to produce calves each year like machines, injected with chemicals to produce more and more milk, and finally butchered when no longer productive.

The sugar mills are famous for exploitation of sugar cane farmers paying them less and less for sugarcane and mill workers as well who work in near slavery conditions.

The fine new outfit you wear on festivals is made of cotton. The same cotton in pursuit of which thousands of farmers take loan each year dreaming of a bumper crop and finally end their lives drinking pesticides when they find themselves unable to pay back the loan.

And your fine new outfit is made in the sweat shops of Southern India or Bangladesh where men, women, and children work 16-hour shifts in congested textile mills in inhuman conditions, leading a life of slave.

The lights that you decorate your house with requires power. Power that is produced from hydroelectric projects by building dam on a river, submerging the whole forest, and destroying the ecology of the river or by burning fossil fuels injecting enormous amounts of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.

Your need for more power, more food, more clothes is leading to destruction of the environment, in turn causing catastrophic climate change endangering lives of billions of people living in the coastal area.

Do you understand now that your mere act of celebration is causing misery and death throughout the world. Would you please your celebrations for the sake of innocent childrens, poor farmers, animals, and to prevent the earth from doom's day.

Moral Lesson: Show middle finger to all those who preach their brand of cheap morality with only superficial if any understanding of the world. Tell them to fuck themselves who come and advise you on the righteous way of leading life.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Unsocial Networks

Courtesy - Effbomb
Taking turn on the bed, searching for the elusive sleep, I picked up the mobile and reached for my ex-girlfriend (presently my wife). As I dialed her number, I was presented with a pleasant female voice, much sweeter than my sweetheart's although mechanical, stating it wouldn't be possible to connect to my beloved as she was on a different mobile network!

Since marriage, we never gave a thought to being on the same mobile network to reduce call cost. It wasn't necessary, after all one doesn't talk much post marriage and in fact, the focus is on how to avoid conversions.

I called the customer care and expressed my frustration at not being able to connect to someone on a different network. The 20-something, I imagined, with image of Pamela Anderson in mind, executive, with an aura of dumbness, was patiently reading me the same paragraph from their trouble-shooting guide, albeit with change of tone, traversing from unconcerned to bored to irritated.

Sir, it is the new policy of Supreme Mobile, she explained, to stop all off-net calls, incoming as well as outgoing, keeping the interest of customers in mind. Interest of the customers, I baffled, but how? I mean, what interest are you talking about? Sir, even though technically feasible, off-net calls cost more to the company compared to the on-net calls. With profits margins improving, the company would be in a position to reduce on-net call rates further and offer exciting games completely free! Hence, it was done in the best interest of the customers, she added exuberantly. In fact, given that our network is the biggest one in the nation, one should not be complaining about not being able to call one particular number, she added. We've got 750 mn users, sir, which gives you 750 mn numbers to call. Isn't that exciting! Why would one even think of calling someone on a different network? Besides, you can always invite your family and friends to switch to Supreme Mobile and enjoy the low call rates and amazing games. Inviting your friends to Supreme Mobile is as easy as sending an SMS! Just type...

It was unbearable by now and I had to disconnect abruptly, without the polity of thanking her. Dumbstruck, I wondered whether my judgment of the world was impaired due to overdose of homeopathic candies last week or the business community of the nation was under terrorist attack by biological weapons which left them incapable of sane thinking resulting in such policies.

You must be wondering where on earth this Supreme Mobile operates, why no action is initiated against its monopolistic policies, how can it be called a communication firm when its chief function is to limit communication. Certainly, there should be wide-spread condemnation of such policies in the media and people would leave such a mobile network. Well, that is not reality. In fact, people are pouring in day in and day out to get a subscription of Supreme Mobile because it gives you free games to play and you can call an astonishing 750 mn numbers. Damn those who are not on Supreme Mobile. They would eventually be forced to sign in because they too can't communicate with those 750 mn individuals. Soon, you would have none but Supreme Mobile as the only mobile company left in the nation.

Now, it isn't a made up story, it's reality, it's happening now and probably you are reading this shit on such a monopolistic platform. It may not be your voice calls that are being limited, but you don't share your thoughts just through you voice, you type text, you click photos as well. Do you realize that!

Cares who, we just fucking love Supreme Mobile and its policies. Monopolistic, huh...

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Have Faith In Science

Courtesy - www.lifestylekick.com
Courtesy: lifestylekick.com
Now, that title is an oxymoron. Science is understanding the world through observation and emperically evidence and faith is "complete trust or confidence in someone or something disregarding contra-evidence.

The origins of this post is a facebook discussion initiated by an intellectual friend, Tathagata, the enlightened one. The question he raised is as follows:
‎"The earth revolves round the sun and the sun does not revolve round the earth" This I learnt in my school days. heard that science has also proved it. Such proof is valid only for them who can understand such proof. I do not have enough knowledge of Mathematics or Physics to understand the proof. I have never been to the outer space to see such phenomenon with my eyes. Never seen any video sent by satellites. Now, is it fine that I believe in such phenomenon?
To rephrase his question:
"Is it okay to believe science since science itself advocates in evedentialism especially given that it is beyond the capacity of an individual to prove all the so-called scientific facts?" To re-rephrase the question, "is believing in scientific fact same as believing in religious fallacies?"

I tried to answer this question in this post.

Footnote (in the header): I am not a philosopher and do not have the mental capacity to logically connect all the dots of knowledge correctly to reach an answer which would be devoid of any fallacies. Nonetheless, I would try my best to put across all the sense that I can make of all the nonsense collected over decades.

My Answer: To start with, I must tell you that your premise is wrong. The earth doesn't revolve around the sun neither the sun revolves around earth. Basically, sun pops out of my ass when I fart early in the morning. And sunset is when I dip sun in my cup to boil water for my evening coffee.

You would do perfectly fine believing in this theory of sunset/sunrise if sun's schedule doesn't hurt/affect you in any way. For example, you never go out of your sealed house where you download all your food and other needs from internet. However, if it does affect, then knowing the truth about the theory is paramount to your well being. For example, if you are a potato farmer and more sunlight (longer day time) results in a better crop, then it would be in your interest to please me to fart a little earlier and have tea little late. So, you might like to offer me a bribe of puri-aaloo dam. Alternatively, if you are a thief, you might like to have longer night hours and bribe me for the same.

Now, suppose that another person, say Bibhas, claims that it is he from whose ass the sun pops out and in whose tea cup the sun drowns. In support of his claim, he says that he is more handsome than me, taller than me, has longer hands, longer legs, and longer everything else, and consequently has better gastronomical system than mine to house the sun. Also, the sun sets in his tea cup because tea requires higher temperature and long boiling duration than coffee.

Now, you are in trouble as you don't know who is saying the truth and knowing it is important to avoid wastefully bribing a person from whose ass the sun doesn't emerge.

Since you are either a potato farmer or a thief, you have little knowledge about human anatomy and have no instruments to inspect human body. So, now you hire a veterinary doctor to examine both asses and find out whose claim is right. Since the doctor can be bribed by me or Bibhas to give a false finding, you would want the test to be double blind, that is me/Bibhas would not know who is examining us and the doctor would not know whom s/he is examining, etc.

In today's hi-tech world, it still leaves some chance of corruption. So, you hire another vet doc to independently examine both of us to be doubly sure of the results.

Basically, you hired the expertise and services of vet docs to give you an understanding on anatomical truth as you lack understanding in that field. You "BELIEVED" the docs because you lacked knowledge in that field. We need to believe a lot of people because it is not possible to acquire all the knowledge in this universe. However, we still utilized our common sense and make sure the study was double blind and repeatable by different persons at different places. 

Once you are confirmed about who is the person in whose intestine the sun resides, you cut the deal with him. However, from time to time, you hire a vet doc and repeat the examinations in light of the current knowledge/understanding of the time to be sure you are not unnecessarily bribing someone.
This is how exactly human knowledge works.

CONCLUSIONS:
  1. Science is about seeking knowledge with empirical evidence which can be independently verified.
  2. Believing is a shortcut to knowledge because our mind would do a lot of processing and generate a lot of heat if we have to process entire knowledge tree to come to a conclusion. For example, when someone asks you what is 5 x 5, you jump to say 25 not because your brain gives empirical proof, but because your brain just "believes" it. To give an empirical proof, you would first need to calculate 5, i.e., 1+1+1+1+1, calculate 5 again, add these two 5's, calculate another 5, add this 5 to the previous sum and so on. In nutshell, empirically calculating 5 x 5 would be something like this - (1+1+1+1+1)+(1+1+1+1+1)+(1+1+1+1+1)+(1+1+1+1+1)+(1+1+1+1+1) and this is what dumb computers do. We humans take the shortcut, we just believe.
  3. We depend on knowledge base created by generations and generations of human beings that existed on this earth. Newton could discover his laws only because some unnamed human, living thousands of years in the past, had figured out that apple could be eaten. Otherwise, no one would have planted an apple tree for Newton to sit under.
  4. So, we do "believe scientific knowledge" apparently in contradiction to the very condition science puts in front of us, i.e., to go only by emperical evidence. However, this belief is only a shortcut as mentioned under #2 and because of reasons as mentioned under #3.
  5. Scientific facts are put to test from time to time and we continuously try to falsify them so as to unearth newer avenues of knowledge. This is what differentiates science from non-science, science takes pride in self falsification.
  6. Under no conditions, this belief can be held true if emperical evidence advises otherwise. Also, this belief/shortcut needs to change if evidence to falsify the underlying fact is found. Again, this is not the case of other types of beliefs, i.e., religious beliefs.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - VII

The Conquest  -  Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The Conquest


Atheist, rationalist, and communists all belong outside of our beautiful planet, crafted to perfection by the lord, gifted ..

Can you think of a reason why would the almighty god create such creatures at the first place? From a theist perspective, certainly god would have not created a thing which would oppose it (not using "him" as it might hurt the esteem of female readers). From a logical standpoint, there was no such thing as atheism before eighteenth century. The concept is merely couple centuries old. How can god create the most intelligent creature on earth, like atheists, after having created everything 6000 years back and gone into a drunken stupor in celebration after it created us, the humans, only creature which knows about the existence of god. Certainly, it would have lost touch in its craft having been out of practice for over 6000 years. We can't even make right of our login password when we return to work on Monday after 2 days of stupor. How can we expect god to create the most intelligent creature on earth after 6000 years on bench. Thus, the concept of god creating such rational creatures itself is irrational.

Now, if you don't believe in god and believe in evolution instead, tell me how can a creature suddenly appear on the face of the earth without being evolved over thousands of years? There is no trace of atheist beyond couple centuries. Even if a few existed in dark ages of humanity, they would have been exterminated by the god-fearing humans for their irrational anti-god views. Certainly, their genes would have had no chance to propagate and no evolution happens without gene propagation.

Hence, both from theistic as well as scientific points of view, it can be safely asserted that the communists, the atheists, the rationalists are anything but earthly creatures. So, the only option left for them is to be alien creatures with a propaganda to invade our earth, god's most beautiful creation by means of evolution.

What would happen to the 330 billion god who would need to seek ashylam in other countries, making it a huge immigration crisis.

The threat to our nation doesn't end in this world alone, but carries over to heaven as well. It is a known fact that homosexuals are barred from entering into heaven. With increasing number of people dying as gays, representation of our nation in the afterworld would reduce drastically. These nonvegetarian Pakisthanis and Bangladesis and the cockroach-eating Chinis would be in majority. We cannot let this happen.

Homosexuality, and trekking as the root cause, has to be eradicated from the face of this nation. We have to be united and fight these infidels. We will have to form party to fight this evils, a men's forum and a women's forum.



To Be Continued...

Previous Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - II - The Barber’s Mirror
3. Confessions of a True Trekker - III - The Alpha Male
4. Confessions of a True Trekker - IV - The (Actual) Lesson
5. Confessions of a True Trekker - V - The Betrayal of Fatherland
6. Confessions of a True Trekker - VI - The Conquest

Friday, September 28, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - VI

Courtesy: Atheist Cartoons
The Conquest  -  Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The Betrayal of Fatherland

For billions of years, the 330 million gods have been protecting this piece of land we call India notwithstanding the claims that the earth is mere 6000 years old and that merely 300 mn years ago, none of the nations existed as we know them today. Now, this very shield of protection is under threat of philosophical terrorism of communists, the god-less atheists.

Don't you see the grand plan of the communists, the god-less atheists? Turn one generation into gays and conquer the land of 330 mn gods in next generation because there won't be anybody to protect those 330 mn gods who protect this great country, or probably the greatest country ever where the number of gods assigned to protect its devotees is higher than the number of security forces assigned for its citizens.

Our great country which ranges from the ever-flooded Asom to ever-dry Gujarat, from ever-protesting Kashmir to ever-bandh Kerala, is under threat of being conquered by those who don't have even a single god!

We already see the signs of this philosophical terrorism of the atheists making inroads in our political and social institutions. Today, the ones who are being projected as youth icon and future leaders don't even have deep enough voice to ascertain their manhood, forget about shaping the future generations. And what is most worrisome is the fact that the entire generations of this mighty land are trying to mimic them in whatever manner possible. Flocks of men with pigeon poop on their faces to add brightness to it, drinking mud-colored water because some baby-faced guy with a high-pitch voice told them to go and get it. And this is in spite of the well-known fact that drinking such mud-colored water makes the reproductive system immensely weak. And the gornament has not taken any step to prohibit drinking of such anti-national drinks! Instead, they have banned the other mud-colored drinks with substance in it, which reinforces manhood even in those men who have been tamed by virtue of marriage. Now, that's clearly a sabotage of national security and it doesn't even find a fleeting mention by the security advisor to PM, a clear sign that the communists have invaded the gornament as well.

In fact, it is not a security problem just of our country but that of the entire earth because the atheists want to capture the world and establish the rule of their masters sitting at the intergalactic spaces. No, no, it's not a joke. I am not talking gibberish. Atheist and rationalists are indeed from an alien galaxy. The evidence is in clear sight.

To Be Continued...

Previous Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - II - The Barber’s Mirror
3. Confessions of a True Trekker - III - The Alpha Male
4. Confessions of a True Trekker - IV - The (Actual) Lesson
5. Confessions of a True Trekker - V - The Betrayal of Fatherland

Friday, July 27, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - V

The Betrayal of Fatherland     -    Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The (Actual) Lesson
Courtesy: Wikimedia

Adventure sports is fast becoming popular among the adrenalin-seeking youth. However, the irony is that the same adventure sports is turning today’s youth into estrogen-seeking homosexuals. In earlier days of my trekking, I was warned about a man who had turned gay and was always on hunt for chocolate faces and had a fetish for hairy chest and polka dotted undies. I didn't believe it then, but now I see reasons with much clarity.

Homosexuality goes against our age-old culture which dates back at least ten thousand years, even before humans agreed on a sexual means of reproduction (this was when apple tree evolved and god from a different continent fooled humans into eating apples saying “an apple a day keeps the doctor away”). We have been doing it the same way ever since under the consent of kings and gods, until the new-age social geeks (aka socialists) figured out that you can reverse the cassette and play it as well!

Now, the entire sociocultural fabric of the nation is being shattered. How can we see a nation under the watchful eyes of 330 million gods turning gay, going against the god’s prescribed ways and doing quirky things? What answer will our coalition governments have when asked by each of those 330 million gods why it couldn’t implement a simple rule of not playing the cassette in reverse, which was being observed for ages?

Now, homosexuality is akin to betrayal of the fatherland, very anti-social, very much unpatriotic. All the rumors spread by the media about social acceptance of homosexuality is part of conspiracy by the communists to concur and capture our fatherland. I know you don’t believe me and you don't have to. Simply use a pinch of common sense. I know you are not an idiot, but your mind has been corrupted by the media. All you need is some clarity of thoughts, some rationality. Just ask yourself this simple question and you would know the truth. If the all young blood on this great land of Kamasutra turn gay, where the future generations will come from? And without any future generation, who will be in the fatherland to protect it and its malls, cinema halls, temples, and stock exchanges from the communists? What will happen to our rich culture of bandh, open defecation, and joint family with nine kids per couple? Think!

To Be Continued...

Previous Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - II - The Barber’s Mirror
3. Confessions of a True Trekker - III - The Alpha Male
4. Confessions of a True Trekker - IV - The (Actual) Lesson

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - IV

The (Actual) Lesson    -    Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The Alpha Male
Courtesy: Heartsong Handicrafts

The competition for mates is cut throat here in the city malls, pubs, and parks, pretty much upholding the supply and demand rule. The situation is comparable only to the communist Russia in the aftermath of World War II, where there were mile long queues even for fat potatoes and stale bread. Thinking of chicken lollipop, insane!

Charles Darwin had once famously said that the competition for mates is inversely proportional to the risk to life. Thus, competition should be far less in a hostile environment like jungles as few would risk life for mates. Or I thought so at least.

While preparing the logical curry of economics and evolution, I forgot that the question of competition comes only when there is a prize involved, a prize worth winning. Have you ever imagined what would happen if the prize trophy in Filmfare Awards is replaced by something resembling an overgrown jack fruit or a bunch of pest-infested ragi? That’s what “competition” on treks is all about. Primary objective for the ladies to trek is to transform themselves from being a jack fruit to the amorous figurine of Filmfare trophy and be back in the pubs and parks right before swayamvar. Now, who wants jack fruit after all the risk and pain of trekking! The prize simply isn’t worth all the pain.

Apart from being a worthless endeavor from the biological perspective, trekking is fast becoming a cause of concern for social integrity and even national security. The gender distribution on treks is highly skewed in favor of polyandry. And this in combination with the jack fruit trophies makes it a lethal cocktail for the society. The results in absolute lack of mating opportunities for any self-respecting, god-fearing mammal with faith in god’s method of procreation. It is a proven fact that prolonged proximity with individuals from same gender, especially in isolated environment like jungles, leads to psychological weakness and the individuals succumb to the psychological-transmitted sexual disorders, such as homosexuality.

Now, please don’t tell me that homosexuality is a matter of personal choice and has nothing to do with social integrity and national security. No one with even an elementary knowledge of evolutionary biology and military psychology would buy this theory. You are not one of those morons who riot on streets with placards in hand about rights and freedom , are you? The propaganda of socialist media has done well to hide the grave implications of homosexuality on our national culture and sovereignty, but no more. We will have raise our voice and awaken the entire nation to the realities of new found sexual fads. The truth awaits.

Next Part: Confessions of a True Trekker - V - The Betrayal of Fatherland

Previous Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - II - The Barber’s Mirror
3. Confessions of a True Trekker - III - The Alpha Male

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - III

The Alpha Male    -    Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The Barber's Mirror
Courtesy: ssoosay

Inside the female brain, an organizer was like an alpha male, always leading the herd towards greener pastures, right in the front with head held high, commanding the harem and rest of the worker males. He would shout loudly "follow me" and an image of superman in red undies would light up inside the female brains with a pleasant tickling of 10 volt DC. The savior of the mankind has arrived! The  status of rest of the men in the team was reduced to mere sterile worker bees whose sole aim in life was to serve the queen bee. The caveat was that all the ladies considered themselves nothing less than the queen bee with a deep-rooted hatred for polygamy. In female brain, one king + numerous queens is not equal to polygamy! I don't know how this equation would ever equate, but nothing surprising given that mathematics has never been a priority for ladies. They even have difficulty counting till 28 each month without making mistakes!

So, I took up the pain to organize treks as well, just to please these beauties. God only knows what all I had to do, burning midnight oil to plan the trail so that the ladies could enjoy all that that they say they enjoy, such as drains, mud puddle, big rock, small rock, fat tree, green trees, red tree; running in and out of the forest offices to get permission to enter the so-called "pristine" forests. I can't make myself understand why these ladies love to update their status saying "entered a virgin forest, one that has never been touched by man". Telling you frankly, all the forest look the same to me, same big trees, rocks, and mud. Only Kamdev would know what the ladies imagine when they talk about virgin forest.

Entering highly-protected forest to please them was sappa matter, we have even burnt entire trees all together inside such protected areas so that the fetish of these ladies to dance around campfire could be fulfilled. And then they would like to get themselves photographed sitting next to the fire, ignoring the slaves who worked harder to collect wood and make fire than they had ever done in the comfort of air-conditioned office.

As it turns out, female brain is far more complex than the credit default swaps around which the entire world economy collapsed. Even though they profess their love for adventure and thrill, the definition of these words are entirely different in their brains. Within few months of my career as trek organizer, complaints started pouring in from ladies community. They complained to the higher authorities that in the name of trekking, I was making them walk as much as 10 kilometers each day, often in sunny weather,  mineral water and chicken were always in short supply and they were forced to make do with stream water and dry chapatis. Neither there was any arrangement of guest house nor any toilet for morning ablutions. Safety and modesty of ladies were being risked on treks organized by me.

Finally, bowing to pressure from women right activists, the higher authorities decided to ban me from organizing treks. My dreams of being the alpha male were crushed right there. A lesson was learned, just like CDS, by the time you understand the female brain, the damage is already done and you are right in the middle of the crisis. All the risks I took for the future profits now looked so much foolish after the fact.

Now, it was time for introspection into the strategies. What went wrong in this grand plan of procreation?

Next Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - IV - The (Actual) Lesson
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - V - The Betrayal of Fatherland

Previous Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - II - The Barber’s Mirror

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - II

The Barber’s Mirror    -    Continuation of Confessions of a True Trekker - The Prelude

Over the last couple decades, photography has advanced so much that it has virtually replaced the mirror. Mirror was 70s. Today's women click themselves to check makeup. Pictures are indeed an integral part of the beautification project, in both upstream and downstream of the project timeline. Apart from being a makeup correction tool in the initial stages, it also serves as an advertising and praise collection tool in the later stages of the project. A keen observer would soon learn about the female need of self gratification in being photographed and seeing others (including prospecting males) comment “beautiful” on it regardless how unrealistic the comments are. What an irony it is that even for those who profess the need of a honest companion, it is simply impossible to reject the gravity-defying elation achieved from dishonest praises.

A direct consequence of this realization was me buying a DSLR lookalike camera and flaunting it on treks. I bought a few used, or rather discarded, photography magazines and picked up a couple photography jargon as well. This added finesse to my image as a professional. These are like magic words, throw a few here and there in your conversation with a DSLR dangling around your neck and your otherwise nonsensical blabber would immediately turn into pickup lines.

Finally, it was a success. Now, I was like a juicy jackfruit surrounded by all sort of houseflies. I was elated to find myself even invited for an all-girl trek! Life couldn’t be more colorful. However, all that goes up, comes down someday and my success was short lived too. My inapt post processing skills took the toll. I wasn’t much successful in hiding the pimples, wrinkles or turning crows into swans , buffaloes into deer. Never knew that ladies find little difference between a photographer and a tube of anti-aging, anti-blemish cream.

Experience is a good teacher. I understood that a photograph is like a mirror for women and a photographer like a barber holding the mirror to show how the back of your head looks. That’s it, pretty much. Now, which women would like a barber for her companion! I understood a woman’s need, need of a strong man who can lead the mankind with a vision, a vision to conquer territories, to lead the herd out of danger, who would appear from nowhere like a tarzan to free her beloved red scarf stuck in the devilish clutches of the thorns, who would carry her the burden of a women with grace on his face. A bit of close monitoring of female behavior would soon reveal that it was the trek organizer who fitted this image perfectly, who was the center of all female chatter.

Next Parts:
1. Confessions of a True Trekker - III - The Alpha Male
2. Confessions of a True Trekker - IV - The (Actual) Lesson
3. Confessions of a True Trekker - V - The Betrayal of Fatherland

Previous Part: Confessions of a True Trekker - I - The Prelude

Friday, July 13, 2012

Confessions of a True Trekker - I

Courtsey: 123RF

The Prelude


Had the female participation in treks gone down lately?

That was the question a moron had put up for discussion in Chennai Trekking Club's Facebook page. A set of equally moronic creatures then divulged into discussing various reasons for the drop in numbers among other things, such as whether actually there is a drop, what data is there to support the claim, should such private matters be discussed in public, why such moronic questions be answered at first place, and so on. Many core trekkers were trying to write off this serious issue simply saying that it doesn't matter and that their objective is to trek and that they are indifferent to the sex of participants. Ridiculous! It seemed to me that these individuals were hell bent on corrupting the young minds and turning them gay! The very reason I joined treks was to befriend pretty ladies, mingle with them, and well, get one girlfriend for myself. Which fool wants to walk tens of kilometers just to see some trees and drainage system of the mountains.  Yes, we do wish to appreciate beauty of nature, but not the beauty contained in those fat old trees! If I wish to see trees or streams, I would rather visit Lalbagh or stand on the bank of Cooum. The organizers don't understand this fact. Sala, the very objective of trekking is being jeopardized now.

After joining few treks, I realized that just being on treks doesn’t guarantee attention from the ladies. The kind of attitude they carry along, ooph! Initiating a warm discussion itself was impossible, forget about igniting the fire of love. I thought it was my thirteen-rupee-haircut or the sixty-five-rupee t-shirt that was to blame, but then I realized that its modern times. The ladies today aren't behind the riches, very unlike 70s when the fat-ass ladies, in tight kurti and an overdose of mascara, would ditch their poet lover to marry a middle-aged seth with a pot belly. Today, cash is passé. What woman want is "character", that is the presentability of a man. Of what use is a diamond necklace in a party if all you got is an outfashioned drum to point at when asked for the source of the necklace? Probably, it was my wheatish complexion that was to blame. Strange it would sounds, but even the ragi-complexioned girls have desire for lighter shade than wheatish! So, what was it that was stopping me from becoming a “handsome man” **?

Footnote: ** Pussy magnet.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Identity of Fear - Why you must name your children as numerals

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Courtesy: Behance Network
A body lied on the road, damaged beyond recognition, blood washed the entire width of the road. The mood was tense in the gathering. A motorist passed by, was immediately recognized as having allegiance to the community of the killer. The mob went astray chasing the innocent motorist. Sensing danger, he turned the throttle and speeded ahead. But the road was not to tolerate this speed, no sympathy it had with him or his community. He lost balance, skidded sideways going straight under the giant tires of a truck in the next lane.

Another carcase lied silently, peacefully. Death was faster than he would have ever imagined. The color of blood and the darkness of night were indistinguishable. There was silence all around, within the dead victim, among the assailants.

The group of dogs, who were furious till now, backed away calmly. Were they shocked by the death of their victim? Were they now contemplating the consequences of their act? Was the anger within the dogs overpowered by the fear of revenge, the anger that arose after one of them was run down by a motorist?

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Ram Must Leave - Who owns Babri Masjid and why

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How far should we travel in the past to deliver justice? To what extent the injustice of the history can be undone? That was the root question of the conflict, the conflict of Babri Masjid. Unfortunately, no court could answer it.

The Logic: The claim of Ram Lalla Virajman, the Hindu group representing Lord Ram (!), over the Babri Masjid land is based on the fact that there existed a temple where the mosque stood now. They claimed the temple was devoted to Ram, which is also supposedly the birthplace of Ram, was destroyed by Mir Baki Khan around 1525 CE and a mosque was constructed on its ruins. Archeological Survey of India has testified their claim to be true to the extent that the mosque was built on ruins of a temple. However, it had no means to confirm whether it was Ram's birthplace or not (no evidence of delivery room was found nor any surgical equipment).

I dispute not their claim about the existence of the temple or Babur's attempt to promote Islam. But can this fact be enough to annihilate what is standing and revive the old structure?

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

How To Be A Rich Nation - Ways to eradicate hunger and poverty effectively

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"Poverty-stricken hungry people of the motherland should look at the Forbes List of Richest and be proud of the 49 Bhindians out there, whose personal wealth account for 31% of Bhindia's GDP."

The "would be" Prime Minister of Bhindia took a long pause with a grin and then continued further. "They should feel proud that the motherland has produced such riches. The pride would suppress their hunger. The pride would turn their skin tolerant to the rain drops dripping through the torn tarpaulin. The pride would come as divine knowledge for their pot-bellied, malnourished children, even in the absence of primary education."

Another long pause and then he concluded, "Eradication of the hungry and poor, is the motto of our party." Roaring claps by hired men (for a packet of biryani) reverberated the sky, clouds of dust covered the midday sun as the men rush to collect their biryani packets.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Bombs and Mentos

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Each day bombs are blasted in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan. Scores of human lives are destroyed,  countless bodies mutilated. Yet, this occupies just a tiny slice of news slot or a distant corner of a national daily. And a disowned plastic bag left in a public place or a minor firecracker takes the tiger's share of news time if the event happens to occur in United States or Britain. As if the lives are valued based on their nationality. Or are the lives valued on their contribution to world GDP? A dead American is a dinosaur, a dead Afghani is a rat.

Analysis: One should have not read the above lines as they're nothing but nonsense. Aren't you aware of the law of "supply and demand." The more the supply, the less the demand or value. So, more the news of blasts arrive each day from war zones of Asia, less the interest will be in public for such news. However, news of a bomb threat in a developed country is a rarity and hence, public interest and time slot alloted for it will obviously be high.

Conclusion: Do not blindly believe and agree with anything you read, see, or listen being wrote, shown, or told by the politician in the parliament to the guru in the gurukul. Carry a pinch of salt along to take with every bit of information (or misinformation) devoured. If you still get swayed by emotions, then "mentos khao aur dimag ki batti jalao."

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Where is the Beef? - Analyzing logics behind Anti-Cow-Slaughter Bill

Karnataka government proposed the Anti Cow Slaughter bill trying to ape many other state governments (February 2010). As is with all other issues, controversies cropped up along with people protesting in favor of it and people protesting against it. Political entities coloring and contrasting the issues in their own hues depending on which side of the fence they lay eggs. Keeping all that apart, let us try to analyze what logics hold here. The objective here is not to hurt feelings but just a rational analysis of reasons behind government policies. But first, my stand on this issue.

WHAT THE GOD SAYS: Hindus in general and Hindu fanatics in particular oppose slaughter of cows stating that since we consume cow's milk, it is equivalent to our mother. The religious texts teaches that we must worship mothers and cows alike. Hence, one should not kill her for the above reasons. Often at times, for the sake of preserving the idea of cow's holiness and stop its slaughter, people go on to slaughter each other. However, the question that needs to be asked is that if cow is so holy, mother equivalent, object of worship and respect, then why it should be kept bondage with a painful string through the nose, why it should be tortured not only with traditional means of beating, limiting its freedom, not allowing it feed all its milk to the calf, but also with modern technologies of injecting painful medicines to produce more and more milk. It is hard to believe that we treat a god-like figure with that kind of respect. Does our religious texts have any answer for this anomaly? Neither the Hindu religious fanatics nor animal lovers seems to be in favor of a ban on milk products, the primary reason for exploitation of their so called mother.

Second point, we drink buffalo milk too and in fact, it constitutes the bigger share of total milk consumed. So, does this not make buffalo as respectful and mother like figures as cows? Why doesn't this buffalo milk prevent us from slaughtering buffalo in the temple premises in the name of sacrifice to god? Or it is that the Hindu castist society discriminates between the black buffalo and white or colored cows. Same holds for goats too.

It turns out that we Indians are quite a bit gender biased too, believing males and females should not have the equal rights. Its evident not only in human society, but also the way we treat the bovines. The female of the species, i.e. cow, is revered as holy and object of worship whereas the male, i.e., ox, is the object of slaughter, all in the name of the same set of gods. Its a bad idea to be a male cattle and a female human in the Indian society.

Moreover, the devotees of gowmata have no remorse about wearing leather shoes. Do they ever bother to figure out where from the leather came from? Whether the animal was slaughtered or died a natural death before it was skinned? Had there been a minute desire to wear leather which came from animals died naturally, there would have certainly been a brand advertising as "Om Shoes, skinned only from animals which died naturally" or "Have mercy, wear leather skinned from animals which died naturally."

Not surprisingly, Hindus do not respect other animals of religious significance too. For example, rats which are considered lord Ganesh's transport system are often subjected to death by poisoning. Those Hindus who sell rat poison and those Hindus who poison the rats seems to have no regard for lord Ganesh's disability to roam around the world without rats.

The case of peacock is no different. It is regularly killed in central India for meat and feathers. Our religious leaders show no interest in protection of a bird which servers as vehicle for lord Kartik in North Indian tradition and lord Murugan in South India. Also, our religiopolitical leaders too seem very unpatriotic in protecting a bird which is symbol of nation's pride.

WHAT THE LAW SAYS: Some from the media shouted that the ban on cow slaughter is in Indian Constitution. Lets examine that.

Source: www.india.gov.in
Article 48: The State shall endeavor to organize agriculture and animal husbandry on modern and scientific lines and shall, in particular, take steps for preserving and improving the breeds, and prohibiting the slaughter, of cows and calves and other milch and draught cattle.
The article 48 comes under The Directive Principles of State Policy, Part IV of the Indian Constitution.
What are Directive Principles of State Policy: The Directive Principles of State Policy are guidelines to the central and state governments of India, to be kept in mind while framing laws and policies. These provisions, contained in Part IV of the Constitution of India, are not enforceable by any court, but the principles laid down therein are considered fundamental in the governance of the country, making it the duty of the State to apply these principles in making laws to establish a just society in the country. The principles have been inspired by the Directive Principles given in the Constitution of Ireland and also by the principles of Gandhism; and relate to social justice, economic welfare, foreign policy, and legal and administrative matters.
Basically, article 48 is not a law but an guidelines which the law makers should keep in mind while framing laws. There are so many other things which should be kept in mind while framing laws but never show up even remotely in the minds of bureaucrats. For example, ban on alcohol, free education, minimum wage, etc. Now, whats so special in this guideline (article 48) that we should surpass all the other guidelines and seek to attain this seemingly irrational and illogical paragraph of Constitution.

With the passage of time, many parts of constitution become redundant, irrelevant to the present social norms, and often impediment to the society. Also, it being written by humans, there are more than fair chances of error, misrepresentation, and misinterpretation. Hence, it needs fixing from time to time by means of amendments. There had been 94 amendments in Indian constitution so far. Section 377 was one such redundant pieces of text which badly needed repair and it was fixed. Well, there were people protesting, but its in their nature and things cool down in the pipeline of time. So, why not an amendment for article 48?

Given the importance of the issue and its ability to cause huge bandhs and bloodshedding in future, I believe that article 48 requires an immediate amendment with removal of the illogical phrase "...prohibiting the slaughter, of cows and calves and other milch and draught cattle."

Here the point worth noting is that, those who keep mentioning article 48 to bolster their case in favor of a ban on cow slaughter often forget to mention that article 48 refers to prohibiting slaughter of other milch and draught cattle too. Other milch and draught cattle include buffalo, goat, ox, bull, camel, horse, donkey, etc. Have you ever heard of any Indian state banning slaughter of all the above mentioned animals? So, it can be concluded that state laws banning slaughter of caw are unconstitutional and inconsistent with article 48 as they do not ban slaughter of all milch and draught cattle.

Moreover, the nomenclature of the bill says it all about the intentions of the legislators. If they were to respect the constitution, they would have named the bill as "Anti Cattle Slaughter Bill" but instead it is named as "Anti Cow Slaughter Bill." So, the important thing here is the word "cow" and not the protection of cattle mentioned in the India's political bible.

If religion is consulted to decide what can be eaten on this land, then we have a very serious food crisis coming up. Every religion prohibits some or other edible from being consumed. Now, if the state bans cow slaughter keeping Hindu sentiments in mind, but do not ban slaughter of all animals as suggested by Jainism, then we can safely conclude that the State of India treats Jain as lesser citizen compared to Hindus.

WE LOVE ANIMALS: The animal lovers say that they simply cannot tolerate the cruelty against animals. They support the ban citing the pain and sufferings of the cows the undergo slaughter. But why just cows? I understand they love other kind of animals such as stray dogs and often have risen their voice against culling of dogs though they are not yet in favor of ban on killing all other types of animals including goats, pigs, chicken, fish, and so on. Probably, they aren't sure enough about the ramification and feasibility of the ideology. Their love affair seems to be restricted to only a few species. Never seen an animal lover in love with cockroaches. To me, the concept of harmonious relationship between species, existence without killing another life, is nothing but an utopia, fairy tale. Here is my previous post on this issue of animal welfare.

WHATS OUR FOOD CULTURE: There is another breed of Indians, the less aggressive ones who pretend to look rational and scientific. These are the people who are not courageous enough to wear their religion on their sleeves. They use science and culture to hide the irrationality of their believes. Their claim, Indian food and culture does not include beef consumption. Now, what all the things are not part of Indian food culture? Shall we not ban Coco Cola, pizza, burger, noodles, chocolate, cake, sauce, tea, coffee, or even bottled drinking water too given that these were imported in our food habit and were not originally part of Indian foods.

Second claim is that beef causes variety of health problems. Everything edible has its pluses and minuses on human health and that varies significantly with variance of environmental factors and individuals. There aren't substantial evidence of health hazards of beef. Even if evidence is found, then it should be left on the individual to decide whether or not to consume it. If the concern is too high to be ignored, then may be a warning like "Eating beef is injurious to health" can be put on it as is done with alcohol and tobacco. Citizen should have the freedom to decide what to eat and what not to. By the why, our overly health-conscious citizens seem to have no insight about the perils of soft drinks and fast foods that is fast gripping the whole nation.

WHERE ARE THE JOBS: Beef and cowhide constitute significant portion of the meat industry (both local and export) and leather industry. I do not have the exact numbers as to the size of both the industries and how many families are dependent on it for their food and shelter (poor kids don't get education, so no dependence for that). A wild guesstimate would be some 10 million workers and if each workers supports a family of 4 (often its more than that), then at least 40 million people will go hungry if the Anti Cow Slaughter bill is implemented. Labor unions and the well-wishers of the poor in the country do not turn up to check the future of cattle herders, butchers, leather skinners, shoe makers, and so on. Probably, the religious sentiments of the political and religious leaders are more important than the lives and livelihoods of masses.

Note: If you know the size of beef and leather industry in India, what percentage of total leather comes from cowhides, how many people are employed here, and other figures, please do scribble that in comment box for a clearer picture.

WHERE THE BLOOD CAME FROM: So why all the fuss about caw slaughter? In my opinion, it is just because this issue can create more political snowballing whereas buffalo, peacock, and rats don't display ability to become huge political ruckus. And why it is so? Most likely reason is that the cow has been branded as the symbol of Hindu pride. Part of responsibility for brandanization of cow as such goes to our right wing political entities and Hindu religious leaders, who needed some brand ambassador to showcase at launch of their religious and political products. But the major part of the responsibility is owed by the new-age Hindus who never bother to read what is actually written in the religious text and are solely dependent on the new avatar of television for their daily dose of spirituality.

It was like a ready-made bomb for the right-wing religiopolitical leaders. They just needed to add the switch, the spark, and press the button. Who will not like to capitalize on such a thing? However, after so many decades have passed, it is kind of difficult to figure out now whether it is the politics that took advantage of mass sentiments or the politics itself got influenced by it.

In the end, this whole holy cow thing is nothing but religiously motivated politics. This is how religion poisons every aspect of our rational behavior be it individual or the so called intellectual bureaucracy, enacting laws prohibiting cow slaughter and feeding their own beliefs.

MY STAND: Being a vegan, I'm not in favor of caw slaughter. But I'm not against caw slaughter either just as I'm not against slaughter of other animals or slaughter of crops for food. It is an individual's choice, not something religious, not something political. But I'm strongly against those who cry foul on this issue while carrying out all other acts of cruelty against caw and other animals. These people never walk their talk and are just interested in gleaning benefits from fooling the masses.

SOLUTION: Create numerous national parks exclusively for cows and adopt it as our national animal instead of tiger. Oh! Did I offend your feelings by calling her an animal?

DISCLAIMER: All the crap written above is plain fiction, has no connection with any live or dead cow or any religious or political entity. If the characters in this fiction resemble real cow or country, then it purely by chance. The author has no knowledge whatsoever of politics or religion and everything written is purely imaginary and baseless.

Related Post: General Theory of Cruelty and Disgust.

Monday, February 9, 2009

General Theory of Cruelty and Disgust

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An hour back, I placed chalk marks in my house of the special chalk that kill cockroaches and now, I am witnessing painful death of a cockroach. After crossing the line and probably sniffing the poison, it started acting crazy, running from pillar to post openly as if it doesn't fear anything whereas the general nature of cockroach is to run away from humans and come out only in dark. It did not know what to do, running for I don't know what, may be for life. It is difficult to assume what was going inside the cockroach, whether it was suffocation, thirst, or something else. It felt as if an invisible gun is behind you and you are aware of it and the fact that it will eventually kill you, but you don't know what to do, where to hide, whom to take help from. Finally, the race for life ended and the roach rested on its back, but still alive. It would lay silently for some time as if dead and then bounce back with vigor in an attempt to save its own life, then silence again. It will be alive like this for hours before other insects starts eating it or I throw it away. Is that what we call a painful death? In whatever way a man dies, be it by hanging, cancer, or beheading, it will definitely be better than the death of a cockroach in this way. I hear, I read people talk about cruel, gruesome killings, about more ethical ways for execution of prisoners sentenced death which are painless. Can we compare any of human executions with this, a cockroach's execution? At times, I wonder how can painless, ethical, peaceful be adjective to death and killing. Isn't that absurd?

There are animal right activist who make noise about ethical treatment of animal, for peaceful death in the slaughter house, against the culling of stray dogs. There are people who don't like to see animals slaughtered, but do like to eat slaughtered animals. There are people who don't like to see animal slaughtered and don't eat meat as a consequence. There are those who turn their face away seeing a dead animal on the roadside or even vomit. But all of these men and women do like to use that special chalk to destroy cockroaches, vaporizers to kill mosquitoes, and the famous hand to squeeze all the blood and internal organs out of the mosquito and enjoy the moment of victory. Is there anything painless or ethical in those acts? It seems that size of the life is more important than life itself. The animal activists don't utter a word when there is a drive to kill mosquitoes by the municipality, but shout their hearts out on dogs being culled. Is it that the size does matter? Can you imagine switching on the mosquito terminator and finding chicken sized mosquitoes all around in your bedroom the next morning, some smashed beneath your back with blood and intestines spread on the bedsheet. Or else imaging placing the system to drive cockroaches to extinction and the next morning, finding dog-size cockroaches half dead on their back, showing signs of life only by moving their extremities slothfully, with froth coming out of their mouth and an expression of death on their face. Now, what shall I make of those who grimace at the sight of a dog run over by motorists, to the extent that it has become 2-dimensional, and then go home and switch on the equivalent of gas chamber to suffocate and terminate the mosquitoes.

The acts of animal right activists seem as if they are a matter of convenience and a way to get the feeling of doing something good. Thats it. Consider this, animal right activists make noise about dogs being culled and do all sort of adaptation drama, but utter not a single word when thousands of poultry birds are culled just because there happen to be suspicion about avian flu. The birds are not even tested individually, just a few birds in the whole district happen to have the stains of avian flu. You may argue that it is the question of a deadly disease and hence culling of birds is morally correct. Then by analogy, isn't killing of HIV or swine flu infected humans too is morally correct?

What Makes Us Feel Disgust: The concept of cruelty varies from person to person and place to place. What is considered unacceptably cruel at one point on earth may just be fine or even fun at another. Looking at various forms of pitilessness in inflicting pain/harm or termination of life, a general pattern emerges about what we human term as cruel and what not. For an act to trigger our feelings of disgust, it must affect us through our different senses and must have one or more of the following elements:
1. Size: The size of the organism slaughtered must be large enough to be apparent and occupy a big section of our visual field. How large is a question of debate, but here is a probable index:
  • Less than 2 Inches (insects): Hardly cruel.
  • 2 inches to half a foot (small birds, rodents): Not yet cruel, but dirty.
  • Half a foot to 1 foot (poultry, cats): Cruel, the cruelty meter starts ticking.
  • Larger than 1 foot (dogs): Definitely cruel, please don't do it in front of my eyes.
2. Hearing: The organism must yell loud enough for us to be irritated.

3. Sight:
  • The organism must emit red blood when slaughtered since we associate red blood with pain.
  • Colorless or bloodless slaughter creates a sense of reduced pain.
  • Disfigured corpus (e.g., severed head, broken body parts) of organism enhance our feeling of cruelty in comparison to non-disfigured corpus (as in the case of natural death).
  • An organism struggling for life while being slaughtered or dieing is a bonus for our feelings.
4. Smell: Smell of fresh blood or decaying flesh also adds to our feeling of disgust.

Hopefully, the above analysis gave you a new perspective and a new line of thought about death, slaughter, and mosquito repellent. If you felt nauseated reading all that crap and wish to kill the author (me), then please remind yourself that it is also an act of cruelty.

You have a right to ask about my stand on this issue. I'm a vegan. The only reason for being a vegan is that it is difficult for me to butcher an animal or bird and I believe that I do not have the right to consume something which I cannot prepare from its natural form (e.g. natural form of meat is live animal). On the other hand, I do not make fuss about culling dogs, etc., just as animal right activists do because it is illogical and partial. Finally, I don't drive the innumerable cockroaches, spiders, etc., out of my house either, not because of any moral compulsions but that I'm a tad lazy to do all these.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Word Feeding

On the auspicious occation of fathering a baby, a colleague of mine posted a picture of the newborn on his orkut album. No harm in that. And afterall every father has constitutional right to post his baby's pic on orkut. Doesn't he? I too, under the spell of human curiosity, clicked to have a look on the pic and it was pretty much normal, a-day-old infant clad in pink Mikey mouse printed suit (too young to know who's Mikey), wrapped in sky blue towel.


It was not the picture but what caught my attention were the comments that followed. One of the response was "Cho chweeeeet....cute baby." Thats a pretty standard response, you do not need to think or even see the infant properly to find appreciable features or things to say about. Just "sweet" and "cute" along with its variations, chweeeeeeeeet, tute, tweet, etc., are good enough, why stress the brain.


Another response was "Mubarak ho dost, the infant resembles u...." Now, this is hilarious. I know the owner of the comment had good intentions (if he had any) and could not read his words as I can. At first, the world "resemble" caught my attention. A 1-day-old newborn resembles to a 30-year-old adult! One can find the resemblence when kids grow up a little, but how is it possible to find similarity when one of the concerned party is a-day-old baby with red swollen cheeks and lips and closed eyes. One cannot even match the eye color. And that too from a two-dimentional poor quality picture!


Now, read the sentence again "the infant resembles u." Such a good friend is he who wants to assure the father that the baby indeed is his, nobody else's, at least not of the good friend's for sure. Even though I am feeling sorry about the father (if he happens to read and understand the comments), I could hardly stop myself double over with laugh.


You might think, it is too much of me to describe all this nonsense. Indeed, nonsense it is, not to dig deep in thinking, but to speak and write words which are not thought, words which are just taken out of shelf. The society seems to have fed the words in our mouth and coded the incidences, where which phrases should come out. We do not bother to think before we appreciate, we just fullfil our social duty using the preformed template. What an unintillegent species the majority of humans are!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Marathi Manoos, Hindustani, or Just a Human on Earth

I stumbled upon an article in NDTV.com which apparently is month old and the issue has cooled down now, but anyway it excellently serves my purpose. Here is the article in original form:

"".... Yes, we all should support Raj Thackeray and take his initiative ahead by doing more...

  1. We should teach our kids that if he is second in class, he shouldn't study harder, just beat up the student coming first and throw him out of the school.
  2. Parliament should have only Delhiites as it is located in Delhi.
  3. Prime Minister, President and all other leaders should only be from Delhi.
  4. No Hindi movie should be made in Mumbai. Only Marathi movies must be made there.
  5. Buses, trains, flights should be stopped at every state border and staff should be changed to local men.
  6. All Maharashtrians working abroad or in other states should be sent back as they are 'snatching' employment from locals.
  7. Lord Shiva, Ganesha and Parvati should not be worshiped in our state as they belong to north (Himalayas).
  8. Visits to Taj Mahal should be restricted to people from Uttar Pradesh (UP) only.
  9. Relief for farmers in Maharashtra should not come from Centre because that is the money collected as tax from whole of India, so why should it be given to someone in Maharashtra?
  10. Let us support Kashmiri militants because they are right in killing and injuring innocent people for the benefit of their state and community.
  11. Let us throw all MNCs out of Maharashtra. Why should they earn from us? We will open our own Maharashtra Microsoft, MH Pepsi and MH Marutis of the world.
  12. Let us stop using cellphones, emails, TV, foreign Movies and dramas. James Bond should also speak Marathi.
  13. We should be ready to die hungry or buy food at 10-times higher price, but should not accept imports from other states.
  14. We should not allow any industry to be set up in Maharashtra because all machinery comes from outside.
  15. We should stop using local trains as trains are not manufactured by Marathi manoos and the Railway Minister is also from Bihar.
  16. Ensure that all our children are born, grow, live and die without ever stepping out of Maharasthra, then they will become true Marathis.
We need to make it clear once and for all, we are Indian first. Mumbai is Mumbai because it is a part of India......""

Source: www.ndtv.com

By this time, you must have been thinking what a great write up it is defining the soul of Indian integrity and that a state is meaningless without the country. True. Indeed it is a great article not just because it provides insight into Raj Thackeray's so-called hate politics or divide and rule politics (doesn't politics itself mean divide and rule). This article also serves as a template to understand another important phenomenon. Now do a small exercise. Re-read the above article again, but whenever you encounter words related to the concept of "Maharashtra," replace it with "India" and replace the concept of "India" with "world." Then, the last line would read as follows:
We need to make it clear once and for all, we are world citizen first. India is India because it is a part of the world.
You may replace India with United States, Pakistan, France, or Somalia. Yet the results are same. But we have never been taught that neither in school nor by the media. Why? Because this kind of thought is called ANTI-NATIONAL. Unfortunately, the common sense is also not that common for us to have our own opinion on such issues. The government of different nations have been doing the same thing what Raj intends to do, divide and rule, but it is given a different name, patriotism. If it is in the best interest of a state to be united with the country, then I believe IT IS IN THE BEST INTEREST OF A COUNTRY TO BE UNITED WITH THE WORLD, ONE WORLD. I know patriotism and nationalism are touchy issues and many questions remain to be answered, but I cannot make this post endlessly long. I welcome questions, comments, and criticism. More information about the concept of one world can be found in www.garrydavis.org.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Indians Now Want Caucasian Babies

In the concluding section of my past post Indian Fascination About Foreign, I was trying to figure out the various ways this fascination culminates into, i.e., we predominantly prefer foreign language and wear foreign clothings, etc. And, I found some more fascinating stuff. Today, I came across this article in outlook This Sperm Counts. This article enumerates the mindset of childless Indian couples opting for IVF (in-vitro fertilization) and details how foreigners visiting India become sperm/ova donors to various sperm/ova banks in India who in turn use those sperms/ova to fertilize infertile Indian couples. But why foreign sperms/ova? The answer lies in what type of babies Indian couples want to BUY from fertility clinics. Here is what Indian couples want:
These are the characteristics couples coming to fertility clinics ask for, fuelling the trend for foreign sperm: * Fair skin * Lighter hair * Blue/green or light eyes * High IQ levels
Now, observe, 3 out of 4 desired characteristics in a baby are the common characteristics of Caucasians, that is Indian couples are increasingly willing for their babies to look like someone whom they consider better and superior. Doesn't the above fact reflect a clear preference/fascination for foreigners? Indians have still not liberated themselves from ghost of foreign rule and it seems most of them feel comfortable in this bondage. A bit of imagination: Now, suppose that IVF becomes so cheap that anybody including the daily-wage laborer earning Rs 50 a day could afford it and Indian law allows even the fertile couples to have IVF and to be able to choose various physical features of babies. Given the Indian adoration of Caucasian race, every couple will be more than eager to have and raise babies of foreigners (since sperms and ova would come from foreigners) rather than propagate their own genes. Soon, in a few generations, the whole country will be populated by Caucasians and not East Indians. And in this way, we Indian will finally reach our goal of looking the most like foreigners, from trying to ape them to completely genetically becoming one of them. But then, who will be the foreigner when we too are foreigners in our own land!