Monday, March 29, 2010

After Effects of Earth Hour

Millions (or say BILLIONS to feel good) celebrated Earth Hour on March 27, 2010 throughout the world. My megacity, Bangalore, participated actively and apart from few scuffles about time of event (8:30 PM v/s 8:30 AM), there were no major incidents of violence.

Some activists got emotional at the end of the event and wanted the Earth Hour to be converted to Earth Year. Few anti-social elements raised slogan that Earth Hour is a propaganda of foreign powers to destabilize Earth. Overall, the feedback from the public was that Earth Hour should be celebrated during daytime. Here is a small list of 7 events that occurred in Bangalore during and because of Earth Hour:

1. There were 7 incidents of major fire at 9:30 p.m. today which kept the fire department busy. The suspected reason is that since all were suppressing fart during Earth Hour (since fart contains methane and methane causes global warming), everybody farted as soon as Earth Hour was over and concentration of inflammable methane increased suddenly at 9:30 p.m. causing outbreak of fire at many places.

One lady's Kanjeevaram silk saree was burnt as she farted explosively near her husband who was smoking. The sari was under warranty.

2. I myself had an accident with a bat after I switched off my bike's headlight and the bat switched off its sonar while participating in Earth Hour. Bat had not brought insurance coverage and my motor insurance does not cover air accidents.

3. Robbers in the city reportedly had huge difficulty as they had to work without torch during the Earth Hour. However, the president of the country had appreciated their effort in making earth hour a success. Robbers Association of India has requested to celebrate Earth Hour more frequently.

4. Couples who went to multiplex to watch "Love, Sex, aur Dhokha" ended up watching "Black" as projector lights were switched off during Earth Hour. Taking advantage of darkness, they betrayed their love, had sex with unseen person (it was dark), and did dhokha with their lover.

The police registered a huge increase in infidelity cases at 9:30 p.m. Multiplex owners also registered complaint against unknown couples for damaging the chairs. Pharmaceutical stores were finding it difficult to satisfy the demand for I-pill at 9:30 p.m.

5. Because monitors had to be switched off during Earth Hour, employees sent job applications to their present employer's email instead of prospective employer. However, this did not sour the employee-employer relationship as the employers were not able to see the sender's email ID.

Employees are demanding that at least backlit keyboards be provided during Earth Hour.

6. The flood lights at the cricket stadium were switched off during Earth Hour. Today's IPL match between Kings XI Punjab vs. Kolkata Knight Riders was played without ball as it was thought ball could hurt players as they had to play in dark. Deccan Chargers won the match.

Sidhu came out with the idea of radium-coated ball specially for matches during Earth Hour.

7. At coaching classes, students were not able to read or write as lights went off during Earth Hour. So, they ended up reading Penthouse and Mastram which they had by hearted and need no light to read.

Teacher said the students should put same kind of effort to study course material as they put for Penthouse. He also that he will send letter to NCERT for inclusion of Penthouse in the curriculum so that students can improve their grades.

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  1. Caroline Smith Renick, WV, USAMarch 15, 2011 at 10:00 PM

    yes, thank you for some much needed levity surrounding "EARTH HOUR"

  2. BDS in Winnipeg CanadaMarch 27, 2011 at 7:53 PM

    we had all the lights in the house on for Earth Hour and also started up our big truck to charge the battery up and called it Human Achievement Hour instead. I particularly liked your item on the saving up of farting behaviour resulting fires. good article Ravi.

  3. Thanks BDS... for the enlightenment about Human Achievement Hour. Didnt knew about it.


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